Sunday, October 31, 2004

today went to cut hair... thinking of changing hairstyle 1... but mum say no $$... so can only go QB...
yah... went there, i say shorten my hair... den say if can den change my hairstyle... the stylist say slope? ok loh... slope den become like last time... but the auntie slope too much liao lah... biangz... now look like going army like tt-_-" dun be surprised when u see me next time... arghz...

...it's autumn time, 9:42 PM

Saturday, October 30, 2004

today jiahui came to return comics.... wah... now den i realise i really growing up liao sia... 19 yrs old... got friends in NS le.... ahhaha... and it's my turn soon... ahhaha... but im still very young though:p hehehe coz haven reach 20:p haha... seeing ppl of my age... and even younger have successful career or bright future... bu jin you dian gan shang... coz i duno wat's mine going to be like... i aspire to be a great director... but i noe im not anywhere near...

aiyahyahyah..... wo de tian ah.... let me see some light in my future leh....

...it's autumn time, 9:40 PM

Thursday, October 28, 2004

today nvr go sch... slept frm 5 ystrday to 5 today... 12 hrs... jzu nice... looks like my old habit is still wif me:p hahah... tt's the only thing tt have not change in me i guess:p hahha...

anyway... watching shui yu zhen feng... biangz... how come last time i dun like this show? quite nice leh... but still i nvr got hooked...

den 630 news... heard 1 news duno whether to be more happy or sad...

DMH, digital media hub... some place where it'll help singapore film makers to be happy about. It has equipments that local film makers can use such as dolby surround system etc so they no need go overseas to do audio editing. It's also a sch to groom more filmmakers and related field talents...

im happy tt the film industry is finally blooming... but unhappy tt is it going too fast? the sch is now concentrating on grooming animators on maya since the lucas is in s'pore... etc etc... and it oso means tt making film is more easier in s'pore now... doesnt tt means it's becoming like hollywood? the competition in tis industry suddenly rised so much... by the time i come out NS... wah... if there's no link i sure cant get a job in this industry 1 loh... summore the younger ppl will oso go even faster... wah.... there goes my dream... hopefully im not tt bad sia... haix... the coming video im going to make... i hope it can win some prize... muz gain some confidence back...

lost too much confidence recently... in all fields of wrk ive done...

pray hard ppl... may my dream come true

...it's autumn time, 7:17 PM

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

today is supposignly yo ne holiday for me liao... but but but... haix... there's still acan which is still not done... anyway... today i tot i can dub the "8teen" to dv tape... den get all files tt anna(FYP superviser) wanted, den burn our fyp video den collect $$ for those dvds etc bought... BUT!... haix... nothing got done in the end...-_- except getting the stuffs for anna...

MEDIACORP! biangz... shdnt say mediacorp... they not at fault... WEEJIN!!!!... biangz... always come den say GOOD GOOD! den no comments abot our video... now got sooooo many dai ji.... keep editing and editing... think fairus and xiuli oso do until sianz like wat liao... den still gotta go there do presentation... wat the*(^!@*)# if wan juz give us treat lah... still presentation...-_-" oso duno wat we can present...-_-'

den helped sam finished the China shirt design today... went for training... so little ppl... den gary like sian sian oso... duno how to cheer him up too... den weibin going to wu zhong... aiyah... sianz sianz sia... maybe im the only 1 happy... hahaha...

went to library meet Jade to pass her bday gift... chatted awhile... short chat:p hahhaa... actually if i 1 psn den i think i'll chat longer ba:p haha... but i oso abit ps...:p anyway... very long nvr see her liao... at least 1 sem... got change? erm... haha... i think yupz... she wore specs:p hahaha... she's studying mah...

today i lead ;p haha... "volunteered" coz feel like leading today:p since weibin oso nvr assigned who to lead today's training mah... den so? haha... i wana go at 9:p qun zhong yao qiu too... so i do everything very fast:p hahaha... biangz... too fast liao:p haha till i cant catch my breathe tt i told gary to slow down alittle... biagnz... im really weak sia... cant even compare with the yr 1s...

during training today... coach suddenly ask me to do some "stunts" for cudgel... den i ai mai ai mai like tt but still do... after tt... coach commented "you le"... den kimyong said..."u got my style le" or is it better den me liao... i duno... forgot... anyway it's compliment from 2 coach..;.* high liao... but at the same time oso i sianz liao... gary and sam is still better den me... yet i got kimyong's style liao?... anyway... tt oso means tt they wana train me in cudgel liao.... i wana learn sword leh... ah.... pressure...

den after training heard tt weibin quit wu zhong when he's given a choice to stay or not... personally... i duno wat's he thinking... but if me, i oso will do the same thing ba... sort of heated argument wif gary den... but nvm... all thing end up ok...

in holiday mood le... but still have to go sch everyday... but if i nvr go sch... my body will feel very funny 1 sia... eh.... sianz ah... holiday... 1 mth only... all muz cherish ok!.... 9th nov going m'sia liao... den come back got conditioning camp... i sure die like duno wat... sure weaker den the rest... sianz... muz diu lian again...

friends being unable to know wat's happening...
friends being unable to know how to help...
friends being unable to understand ur thoughts...
friends that are not informed of wat happened in the cause...
friends... is that still called friends?...
am i a friend to him? to him? or to him? to anyone...

they are in "trouble" yet all i can do is to do nothing... guys this time is even more chim to handle with...

...it's autumn time, 1:44 AM

Thursday, October 21, 2004

YEAH!FYP OVER!!! tt means tt's the end of my stress...

eh... not really lah... still got ACAN... den still got 1 more presentation @ mediacorp... sianz...

arghz... today the presentation... jialat... tt timR (judge) comment so much tt i dun wana conclude the presentation and went straight the Q&A session liao.

Anyway... this presentation wasn't very gd, but it wasnt bad either... but somehow it's smooth ba...

now worry for ACAN ba... haix...

...it's autumn time, 10:22 PM

Tuesday, October 19, 2004

this is going to be a very very long 1... so...

chapter 1 - The disappointment
Club got vulgar? guess im the cause ba... maybe gary too...but he long nvr say liao... so it shd be me...disappoint haijiao again?... haix... she seems very unhappy when i said TMD... den she commented club getting vulgar.. muz be me... guess she's disappointed in me... disappointed wif myself too...

chapter 2 - The death of a will
Became poorer in wushu liao...i noe myself tt i got lots of room for improvement and noe i can improve 1... but no... duno the reason... i juz cant be better... cant reach the peak... maybe wushu is no longer the wushu i knew ba...

chapter 3 - the thought
Felt so useless these 2 weeks... failed to accomplish anything properly... there's nothin i did tt im satisfied with... the reports i do, the animation i did, the trainings i did... all im not satisfied with even i really put in my effort already... injured myself and yet i had to go on...i cant juz stop... if not i'll not be able to move forward... i wun wana stay in the same place... but looks like ive taken steps back instead... felt so sianz... FYP faster end ba... den can really be free le... wana have a break by myself soon... juz myself to clear and clean up my thoughts... time to pack my brain le... den i'll come back a new me, wif the old self... would u understand this? do u noe wat tis means? hope u noe... coz i dun really noe it myself:p

chapter 4 - the pain
A tooth is growing out of my gum... finally an adult teeth i guess.... but it's pain, more like sore... but dun dare to go see dentist... ex, later go pull out my tooth will den spend my dad lots of $$$$$$... hopefully NS medical checkup got check teeth, den maybe got free treatment... hahahha...

chapter 5 - the anime
ystrday after finishing my report... i watched a few episodes of anime... but in the end watched the whole of it... think around 10 eps ba... anyway... it's shaman king.... the story touched me alot... the friendship btwn the companions and yoh is sooo strong and touching... they believed in yoh so much and really put their trust in him. and thus their faith are strong... etc etc... cool anime... how i wish i can be yoh... where ppl will put their full trust in me and believe in me... "dai jo bu... it'll wrk out somehow..." that's yoh's fav quote... cool guy... wana be like him...

chapter 6 - Lost, hun bu shou she
i dun understand why... but maybe im stressed up not knowing myself... and that's why im not doing well in everything...sat i went to SIR building wif my dad hoping to extend my passport... but i alighted at bugis instead of lavender(a place i used to roam during sec) den nvm... i waited for the Q for half an hr den realised tt i nvr bring my IC... den cant extend passport...-_-"
today i thought i lost my comics (last week i thought i lost my bottle) and actually is i forgot and left it in the lab... but no matter how hard i recall... i dun remember i leaving them there... sianz... wat's wif me really?... arghz... am i really tt poor in memory? poorer den gary? how come he is suddenly surpassing me in everything? or is it tt he's really better den me and now den i realise it?... am i tt lousy?... haix... what happened to me recently?...

chapter 7 - the past and present
but compared to the past... compared to when im sec... yah... i got lousy... i got poorer... i got worser... i still feel like the sec sch me... but it's impossible to return back... coz the friends are different, the environment is different, the age has changed, and the persons are not there either... im losing quite alot of stuffs already... can i stop losing anymore? think 1 day i'll be left wif no more you dian liao... all is que dian...

7 chapters... but it still doesnt seems long... haix...
thu coming soon...

...it's autumn time, 1:56 AM

Saturday, October 16, 2004

hehhe... abit side track from my report 1st:p why? wana do a quick update... hehe...

MSN rox:p hahahah... last time can say nvr talk to shinsian 1... now got much more chance liao:p haha... juz chatted awhile den got to noe something:p
hehehe

she oso went to join the "Hao Yi" show:P hahhaa... and she got SECOND summore!!! hahhaa... better den me:p i go there lao kui only:p haha... but anyway:p hehhe... so happy tt she got join:p den when i tape the show muz record hers too... but during tt time IM IN MALAYSIA!!! can anyone help me record the show???!! PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe....:p hahaha...

kk... going back to my report liao... hey guys and gals! gd luck to ur upcoming exams! and hahha... those gals waiting for their darlings to come out muz be very happy liao rite? ahhaha... dun rape them ah!... those boys still need their energy back in camp...

...it's autumn time, 11:38 PM

came early mrning... my acan com was being logged out once again-_-" shocked... so no choice and got another com and started rendering but the machine is sooooo lagging tt i cant even use MO wrd...-_-"

so how? try 3rd floor loh... den went pass 55... and wsa pretty surprised... so many coms not used! hehe... take advantage... i ba zan 4 coms to do my rendering and 1 com to do my report... wah... the rendering time oso very shiok... only a few hrs... so stayed and do my report all the way until the next clazz came... the teacher very selfish... she chased out everyone thought there's so many unused com... i say i rendered for 1 hr liao... still got few more hrs left... so she no choice let me stay loh:p hehehe... but it wasnt very long till i rendered finish... very satisfied with today's progress... my acan is done, report is 30% completed. think by mon will have everything laio:)

so everything was so happy... den duno why... gary and weibin abit spoil the rest of me liao... * commented on my voice to loud... the i shut up le... dun wana speak... sianz sianz all the way... and tt marks the result of my grading i guess...

everyone was putting in alot of effort to make this grading a passing one... retest remember?... den i juz cant do all i can today... during rehearsing... i already somehow noe how i'll rate le...

den even more suay... im the 1st to go... but no choice... couldnt let jul go 1st... after the qi shi... game over... everything lost liao... and results? yes... damn disappointed... very dissapointed... very low... tried to act like nothing happened... but dun think so ba... haix... will forget abot this very soon...

anyway... gary and sam did well, winhung did much x million better... and peixuan, yah.. u too nua liao... jiao smiled... jul... no comments...

den got home... even more depressed...

kena complained... haix... actually expecting the complain... juz didnt noe it came so late... asked b4 xiuli whether i not present in sch got ppl complain anot... she say no... but dun think so...tt's why:p hahaha... 1 week of break, 1 week of MIA, 1 week of grading, 1 week of sick, 1 week of grading again... wah... is tt how much im disappearing?...

not funny... trying to make myself happy only... very sad now... even more depressed... ja ne...

...it's autumn time, 2:25 AM

Thursday, October 14, 2004

WAH!!! today really train till i pengz...

today i woke abit off time... no... shd be way off time... off time till by the time i come sch all com has already been taken up... sianz... really destroyed all my schedule sia... hate oversleeping but cant do anything abot it...

mum sick today... think i passed my cough to her... den she say i shd be recovering soon... but no leh... i still sick...-_-"

anyway... so 3pm went for club meeting... den im very satisfied with weibin's training proposal... hopefully it'll be almost wat we'll be doing...:p
den peixuan they all discussing tshirt design... diaoz... haha... joel and youming... wah.... troublesome sia they 2... haha...

anyway... at 1st nvr go training 1... coz i tot i'll be doing assignment... den who noe today lab close early... diaoz... so went for training loh... in my bemudas:p hahaha...

den today training really really xiong... and i think i really improved alot... but still not smooth sia.... i really hope tt fri i can pass... wif flying colours too... but den my finger... today got worse... the blue black spreaded to a bigger area liao... haix...

den jiao and jul nvr come training today... are they going to retake the test this fri?... duno sia... if they take again i think might fail again leh... haix.. nvm...

gotta do the report liao... biangz... it's giving me a reallllllyyyyyyyyyyy big big big headache... sianz... gd luck to all taking exams, jiayou!!! those FYP jiayou even more!!!! and those waiting for their dear dears to come out on 16th... hahha... happy waiting loh:p hahahhaa

...it's autumn time, 1:09 AM

Tuesday, October 12, 2004

today... im suppose to be happy... coz... 1 MORE WEEK TO FREEDOM!!!! hahaha.. yeah! i got no exams and tt's something to be happy abot... and my holidays is starting to get packed and im really happy abot tt:p hahaha... tt means i no need to rot:p hehehe...

den today...FINALLY!!! authoring is finally DONE!!!! with the coding lah:p haha... the documentation ccl they all will help me do:p hehhee... thx ah!:D so 1 thing settled:p left with animation...* headache... and FYP... * even more headache... i duno how the hell am i going to do the report... -_-:

k... so weejin(client from mediacorp) came to take a look at the video... heng and glad tt he is satisfied with the video... was always afraid tt they might say tt the video will not attract teens... but nvm... they like it... we're done... but not quite done... still got presentation...

so the illness i had is so called gone... still got flu and bit of coughing left... but the voice came back le...:) cheers for me:P hahha...
den everyone was so bz... tt i really duno we can make it in time by mon hand in everything anot... report, prospectus etc etc...

anyway... jiao sick liao... this is the 3rd of 4th time i see her lost her voice liao... wish her recover soon... cherish this friend alot... those from club shd noe:p hehehe..... bao zhong shen zi to all the rest of my friends out there... dun fall sick wor! dec coming... season of common flu....

so... went wushu today... today is the last training for me... friday is the retest liao... last fri i miss the training coz i sick... so today wana bia... BUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!..... i hurt my finger-_-" kena hit by my cudgel... the whole finger swollen... now blue black laio... sob sob.... and tt means???... i can only train with 1 hand... lucky is my left finger hurt... if not really cant train liao...

fri is the test... wed maybe got training.... i wana go for training... but my proj... arghz... of coz shd go do proj lah... but i really dun wana fail my grading test... 1 is paiseh... 2 is will really lose my confidence in wushu if i fail again... haix... nvm... since my fingers oso now hurt... duno lah... hope tt qiao dao chuan tou zi ran zhi... hope tt grp members will understand me more... but most prob not possible... since ive not mixing with them for almost 2 weeks le?...

came across this from my friend's blog... very interesting... very touching...

...it's autumn time, 2:27 AM

Thursday, October 07, 2004

today... still sick... since 2days ago... i guess...not very sure... wah... feel very xin ku at sch.. den wana go see doc... but pian pian wheni reach home liao den i felt better... (there's no place like home?...-_-")

anyway... today after going to check the FYP stuffs... i have to attend the comm meeting... wah... sick sia... still have to attend meetings... FYP... arghz... stress load high...

committee... yah... like gary said... disappointing sia... oso disappointed wif coach... but today's meeting i was very satisfied... coz they finally going to do "revamp" liao... finally start to heck abot not enuff members stuff... wat will yr 1 think stuff etc etc...

eva since i got comm post... i dun feel the club as the club before... very disappointed... everything was like in haywire... den comm doesnt look like comm... feels like taiwan parliament like tt... no common goal... today... ok lah... the goal seems clearer... but much more wrk needa be done sia...

actually b4 i became comm member... i already had lots of hopes and aims for the club laio... but eva i became comm member... everything was put off... coz no feeling to do liao.. till recently den i feel like doing the wushu promo video... hope tt it'll be successful.

i claim it as I'LL be doing the video so tt the club cant stop me from producing it:p haha... but nevertheless... im so called approve to do it ba...

got sooooo many aims, goals etc etc for club... but it's juz impossible for me to do it within a yr... summore it isn't of my capability... if leslie is the chairman for alumni... i'll defnitely wana be the vice:p hahahha...

anyway... for gary... yah... as i said... before disappointing in club or coach, are u disappointed wif urself? if u have not done ur part in comm and said u're disappointed, den u're really disappointing... only if u have really did ur best for the club and the club really fails u... den it's more proper to say tt u're disappointed in club...

to peixuan... i noe u as president very stress... but sometimes u shd really say out ur troubles to us committee... or even to me as friend... well take care... all the troubles and problems tt arise due to club, shd be solved by club... it need not to be solved by u only... it isnt fair... dun take everything to urself and stressing urself... take care... ja ne... jiayou... i believe tt u'll bring the club to another height...:)

...it's autumn time, 1:36 AM

Monday, October 04, 2004

quick update... today went to join a channel U competition... it's for Hao Yi's variety show... Wushu competition... i competing ying zua... eagle claw...

so im the 9th psn... i joined coz i can still see some of my age ppl join:p hahaha... wana compete with them.... too bad i lose...

why?....>>>> k... so everything was ready... but after my xuan feng... i forgot my routine again!!! AH!!!! WHY??!! recently keep forgetting routine sia!!! 3 times consecutive! 1st time is during intersch competition... den grading test... den today!??!!....-_-"

anyway... think the hosts abit paiseh lah... so they somehow let me sit at the "bao zhuo" loh...
ok... i got the chance to take a seat at the "bao zhuo"... but not for long.... hahaha... another girl oso yingzua came... wah!!! she damn gd! i admit defeat (anyway... i admitted defeat the moment i forgot my routine...) ... and yah... and off i go... actually i not disappointed abot me losing... BUT! i forgot my routine... den hang there like duno wat... den in the end anyhow do.... wah!!!! paiseh ah!!! summore i think it'll be aired? OMG!... pls pls pls... if u eva see it!... dun laugh at it... i think i might get angry...

haix... late le... still got so many things haven do... arghz... stop liao... go do my stuffs liao... tml gotta do ACAN and ADVA... stress... tired... at nite still have to chiong wushu... 2 weeks later retest...

...it's autumn time, 1:56 AM

Saturday, October 02, 2004

haix... nowadays can see my friends very very bz... all no time to blog le i guess...

and so do i... im going to get real bz soon... but hopefully i wun be very stressed abot it ba... starting frm next week... have to fully concentrate on FYP... BUT!!!! sianz... today i got to know someone MESSED UP my ACAN files.... and i saved accidentally... now all the characters and models are deformed... and tt means i gotta redo... ARGHZ!!! TIAN AH!!!!! WEI SHEN ME ZHE ZHONG SHI HUI FA SHENG ZAI WO SHEN SHANG!!!!

haix... muz be punishment....

den still got ADVA... ccl... if u reading this.... pls take note tt we have to bia our ADVA lioa... sob sob...

thought tt's the worst?! NO!!! sianz... today wushu grading... I FAILED!!!! AH!!!!! lucky got retest 2 weeks later... haix.... i felt the grading was unfair... coz we got too little time to prepare... we've only took less the 8 lessons to learn the whole routine and take the grading today... everyone failed for the routine today... damn! next week i swear i wun fail at least score 8points!

.... but tt oso means to increase my stress load... hope i can take it...

juz reading newspaper den found out tt Channel U is searching for ppl who noes wushu to join some sort of competition for Hao Yi's upcoming variety show... i feel like joining leh... but scared paiseh sia... coz scared i go there "ban men nong fu" later alot of stronger opponents there... den me with the "zhi ma lu dou" skill... haix... no confidence... especially when i failed my routine today...:( anyway.... i only noe 4 routine... chaquan, 4 duan, ying zua and cudgel (which i juz failed) think only yingzua can make it... but still veyr poor... haix... shd i go? think it'll be one very fun experience leh....

...it's autumn time, 3:25 AM