Everyday is a sunny day!

Jul and aunty asked me to blog... but my life now like nthing to blog... hmmm

Last week, ive been very bz wif wrk... super bz... everyday OT...

den finally came 27th oct... her bday... her actual bday (lunar)...

when we 1st started out, we're excited abot tis day... coz she only celebrates her lunar bdya wif her family... and if tt day i got give her present, she might be able to intro me to her family...

27th oct... there's 3 wedding shoots... from early mrning i had to be in yishun... den went back office, wrk wrk wrk wrk, den nite i went back yishun to Orchid country club for the shoot...

i called to jul... asked her to buy a ice cream cake for me, in the end joanne went, den after the shoot... was like 1130 le...

was abit kanchiong... coz i scared she's going to slp le... tried booking for cab... but today is a super hot date for wedding.. there's no cab at tis hr!!!!!

in the end i called her, she's slping le... no choice... i juz had to gave up the idea... finally the cab came... i went toh guan to collect the cake frm jul... *hey thx... made u stayed up till so late...

juz when i reaching batok area.. she smsed.. haven slp... so i asked her to wait for me for awhile...

i took the cake liao den rushed to her le...

how do i say? to me, it's lots of emotions... i sang her a bday song... let her made a wish... i wonder... wat wish is tt... is tt e wished tt weve made together some time ago?...

we've talked for awhile... she hugged me... and i think i heard her crying... did i touched her heart?... but i guess... it's still not enough... i still have a long way to go...

115am... she went home... while i walked home... half an hr walk back home...

every small little things i do for her... i hope she can see it... i hope she appeciates... and of coz... i hope she's happy... i shd say, 1 smile on her face, takes away all my sadness for the day...

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i haven gave her the gift... coz i haven complete the dvd... it's the part where it'll make the whole gift wonderful and nice... i want to complete it asap... coz im already late... OT OT OT!... i'll be wrking OT to clear some of the projs at wrk, so tt i can spend a some time on it...

5th nov... im going over to malacca for a day, wrking reason, so dun expect me to buy anything...=p coz i think i shd be wrking all day long and only break for meals...

if i return to s'pore by ntie, i'll drop by wushu=)

...it's autumn time, 12:47 AM

im wondering... did anyone noticed tt my msn pic has been black all these while?

It's not that i dun wana put any pics... but all the pics i wana put... doesnt really... doesnt really suit my feeling... and my nick...

shu shou wu ce... im really out of any ideas and etc etc le... i duno wat to do le...

if death can solve everything... i would gladly do so... but too bad... things in life nvr ends so easily de...

my heart and my mind, they're saying the same thing... i cant follow my heart, neither can i follow my mind... both ways leads to the same answer...

im really tired and split... and all i wish for, is an answer from her...

i'll be taking a rest i think... i really need to rest now le... im tired, as in im shag, mentally and physically weak now... im not sick and tired of her... coz i nvr will...

maybe i will, im tired of her saying i duno...

if death can really solve everything... im glad to do so...

hope i wun do anything foolish *relax... im not committing suicide...

...it's autumn time, 12:27 AM

haha... i think u all gonna kill me le... but i really bz... lol... kk... next week shd be abit free up le... but next mth i oso bz... super 1... lol

kk.. today i went out for a shoot... den the producer is actually the psn who interviewed me when i went to hoods production... she actuall recognised me... paiseh.. lol... coz i dun remember her face till she say i went for the interview at hoods lol...

anyway... bz scheduled.. im abit overwrked... but no choice... coz i slow... den today joyce(admin de collegue) she called adn asked whether i can go shoot a wedding on my own... im so darn tempted to say yes lah... but i need some time to reconsider... but she say she need the answer immediately... so i say no... coz i cant afford to juz go like tt, summore i only went for mrning wedding once loh!... so i think i shd go for at least 1 or 2 more time den i take on my own... risky though... but i think i juz give myself more confidence shd be okie ba...

*i think the last shoot i went was okie, i did it on my own... i duno... coz he nvr see the video, and so nvr comment... ah... pray.. lol...

...it's autumn time, 11:45 PM

Back date blogging... super back date...

kk... the training camp was 5d4n? i think so...

but i think i stayed for 3 nitez... lol... but i nvr take off... i juz slp there the nite... and go to wrk the next day

hm... the camp was not like my batch tt time le... i still think our time is much more fun, at T11a there... so cosy, den everyone play together... till 3am de go slp.. den there'll be this pair of girls go round disturbing ppl's slp=p

hm... so 1st nite... i came after wrk? *bad thing abot back dating, coz sometimes u dun remember le... lol... yah... shd be thu ba... coz i got the memory after their training, we went to eat at the coffeeshop at the old bus interchange there...

abit bu shuang coz we went to kopitiam, den they nnvr help us find seats... -_-" sianz... i duno lah, maybe i veyr gek gao... but i think it juz show the attitude or say courtesy is not there...

anyway, we juz went to another tt coffeshop lah, den came the rest of the seniors *seniors means yr3, im alumni=p hahahha...gary too...

den after dinner, we walking back, but tt gary suddenly old injury wrked up... den cannot walk-_-" almost need to carry him back...

eh... i spent the few ntiez there very happy... though abit tired, but very satified... hm... i juz felt very sweet and comfortable being wif her... i think i got make some of the ppl abit bu zhi zai... but i got try to disturb them, like tt to 'normalise' the atmosphere...

eh... i duno abot the rest... but i really think cuddling/hugging really very comfortable loh... and felt very loved... we only have 1 pillow and we're slping on the floor, den she keep giving me hte pillow, den she slp on my chest... but she dun slps well...coz not her bed... den wake alot of times... i think i nvr slp tt nite, at most 1hr like tt ba... coz most of the time im taking care of her...

den next day mrning, go wrk... tired... lol... keep dozing off at office...

but anyway, next day fri, went home 1st ot repack... den went wushu after tt...

2nd time we eating together for supper le... it's rarely we can eat together. coz normally her dad will go fetch her... veyr happy being wif her=)

den go back sp again to slp... coz we nvr eat wif the rest of the members, so when we came back, she had to go bath alone, so i accompanied her... think jul will say something here... so i shall make clear 1st... i nvr bath wif her... lol...

the 2nd nite... slps really much better... coz i brought 1 more pillow=p lol... tis nite, she slps really well... coz she slp le den nvr wake up all the way le...

izzit coz of me?... haha... i do hope it's coz of me though...

next mrning, wake up early early, coz gotta go wrk... kissed her b4 i left...

noon came back to sch, coz going the wushu display... sianz... made 2 psn angry-_- one is her... coz i managed my time wrongly, den she cannot go eat dinner... den alot of thigns happened ah... suddenly need to meet tingyun, den jiao they all oso late, den i duno tt the members actually got lorry to bring them over instead of they going over themselves-_-" ive been waiting for htem for nthing-_-" den gary going off wif gatz audi sport... sianz....

den finally reach le... den leslie pissed off... coz he borrowed a lorry to fetch everyone in the end only yongxiong turned up... wah sianz... i oso duno mah... den 2 psn angry wif me at the same time, makes me super pissed off too... really angry tt day lah...

but all things ends well ba... yah... =)

went to jiao's place for mahjong session, brought her along=p haha... coz i nottie=p dun wana let her go back=p hahaha...

so play play, den she sat beside me play mahjong wif me... wah... lucky star.. i win loh, lol... qing yi se=p hahhaha... but later when she go slp le den i lose lioa-_-: lol...

sent her back early next mrning, coz she still got training...

den by right i shd be going home... but too tired... so slp there 1st while she's training... after tt got prgrm...

wat prgrm? shall update in the next entry

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our bunk last time got so messy de meh? boys room-_-" i still prefer girls room... no smell de loh!... lol... last time we hanged where ah? outside rite?

cmi-_-"

my days was happier with her around=)

yisi keep wanting to slp, so i let her wish come true

wahaha... evil me

*they actually have a 'party' nite... but den... nthing interesting, coz not all enthu... =p

...it's autumn time, 10:40 PM

hi friends... long nvr see me updating le rite???? i stil can only say sorry. im really bz... and tired...

my com break down again few days ago...

now going to borrow 2k frm my relative to fix 1 up...

life wif family seems okie now... but things are going back again... coz mum is now nagging me to put the chinchilla outside house... i have no choice... i'll have to leave them outside... but not now... i dun have time to do it yet...

love life? im still very troubled... im juz praying, waiting, wishing for an answer to drop upon me... i really dun wish to give her up... but she kept saying tt she dun worth for me... wat can i do to make her realise tt i really love her and stop her frm thinking tt way?

i duno how much longer i can take tis... but it wun be long i noe... if she cant make a decision... to love me or not... i think i juz have to be make mine....

i dun wish to do it... i dun even think i can do it...

i need lots of support.... haix....

...it's autumn time, 2:49 PM

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