Everyday is a sunny day!

Today went back to office to work in the morning.. long since i need not shoot and just go back for editing... in a way, it's really relaxing...

so on the way up the escalator, something flash past my mind... it was years ago... on a normal day back to studio. i think i told u all before here on blog... that there's this women at the top of the escalator shouting for help. all those at the bottom of the escalator didnt react at all.

It's only when i reached the top den i realise she was really asking for help as she's molested by an indian guy... some others was actually chasing after him and grabbing him...

I felt quite guilty the whole day later... why i nvr render my help... and actually still thot that she;s some crazy women shouting around?...

i think it was from den on... when ppl needs help... i noe i'll be there 1st... and that's why im quite landing myself in some extra work now=p

...it's autumn time, 2:14 AM

Am i really that scary?

A question ive been asking myself lately.

Though ive cleared up the misunderstanding with her... but... did she really understood? or she understood... but im still that scary to her?

I just felt that she's different now... no longer that friendly to me... no longer talking to me... no longer concerned of me... even when i tried talking to her online... she doesnt give me a reply at all...

Im really regretting alot... though those happy memory stays...

haix... holidays is here... yet my work is still tonnes... and i actually stupidly helped the whole class with the production and casting!... i also dun realise why i did that for... it's like going to make my 24hrs a day to 48hrs in order to finish it=( ahhhhhhhhh.... where's my holidayssssss????

...it's autumn time, 12:55 PM

Yesterday was really a happy day for me. It's been long=p

Felt excited and really happy... why?

First, im having a half day shoot.
2nd, the venue is so near west, so i can wake later.
3rd, im able to rush down to rane's engagement!
4th, im able to complete studio's highlight within 3-4hrs
5th, i went to support ghazi short film even though i still missed it.
6th, i ate cheap good food at aston!
7th, hehe... im going to get a new splash of of paint for my room... though at the very end... i still chose purple-_-: lol... enticing purple...

really enjoyed myself today... it's happy right from the heart... seeing rane getting married... it actually really felt like my sis getting married lah!=p it's juz bit sadded tt i cant stay for long... i practically spent $16 cab fare to chiong there, stay for 15mins and rushed back to studio liao=p

but seeing her smile on her face... i noe that she'll be blessed by that guy=)

After rushing off, i got on this cab... where the cab driver talk non-stop... abit irritating... but he's a nice guy. Coz i dun have enuff to pay, so he say nvm... juz pay him watever amt i have... in the end... the cabfare was lower and he still returns me 50c.

Back in studio, everything was quite simple... though i fell aslp thrice while trying to wrk as fast=p...

Ran to Substation straight after the editing... was quite glad i made it by the 2nd film.. if not i would have really wasted geck's money for buying the tix for me... but anyway, there's not a need to either... coz i nvr get any tix and i went in... lol... no seats left though=p

seems like being happy doesnt always show on my face as well=p

Later on went to eat wif geck and kangxiong... went to aston... like finally... we waited for an hr+ though... the waiter there is irritating as well... though they're joking... if not of my good mood that day, i think most prob i would be pissed off=p
but anyway, those who nvr tried aston b4.... maybe u shd... coz for the price and the quality... i think it's really worth it?

waiting for food after a 30min queue?

Geck always ready to pose~

Went home and chatted with a few people... but somehow... there will be some who wun... though i tried... feels very... dejected... avoided/rejected/ignored... just felt upset. When things happens... cant friendship be just brought back to normal... i felt tt im being phobiaed... misunderstood... even though i explained... but tt black spot nvr seems will be removed...

haha... a happy day wif a sad anything. this is tragedy... at least the film im going to make over the next few weeks... it's a happy ending... hope tt i can get the cast i want=) hope tt i can get the help i need... there's lots of hope... let's not pin hopes too high and make myself fall again...

...it's autumn time, 1:31 AM

for a sudden... i felt extra tired today... really drained...

my aches starts to come in and i wished for someone who could have massage for me...

arghz... it's still as bad this week... my story was rejected and the prof is really damn idiot... coz he rejects for his biasness and his critiques are irrelevant! im damn irritated and pissed off and i got v v v stubborn wif my idea...

Though now a new story was thot up wif the help of xinni and yuehan, somehow, i felt tt wif my command of language, he's going to play wif the words i use again and reject me. damn... =( i dun wana shoot adaptation! shitz.... i rather be Art and Cinematogrpaher for other ppl den to shoot something that is not myself anymore...

Felt damn cui... all my assignments are behind by 2 or 3 weeks now... and the story keeps failing and i needa spend time on thinking of it... den it rolls up tt i have no time to do other assignments... damn pissed

Let's hope the long weekend i would be catching up alot... hopefully... there's so much to be done...

Ystrday, juz gave my editing wrkshop... though it's lesser ppl den i expected... but well... i did wat i promised... guess it's a wrap? hm... those who wants me to conduct again... maybe next time ba.. 1 to 1.. or 1 to few...

tired... this week... is much or realisation. Realise tt if i wana invoke a certain feeling to the audience. i Must make it to the extreme and dramatise it... so that u have no choice but it decipher it as wat it shd be... which.... sad to say... i dun really prefer... but wat to do? if jaymz dun like it, i cant shoot! wth=(

haix...

This week is like this... to help others, i must save myself 1st...
Operations save myself starts this week....

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...it's autumn time, 11:22 PM

Kudos to WeeeeeLLLlliiummm!=p

Why? coz he jioed us to go watch JUMP! concert...

It's a group of korean martial artist coming together to perform a comedy.

It's really damn fun.. at least i really enjoyed myself and laugh my hearts out=) damn long nvr enjoyed like tt lioa=p though not really damn long lah... a mth plus?

You guys shd really catch it the next time round=p

Next show on the way, gary is going to jio us to STOMP!
YAY! lol... cant wait for it=p

Updates on other friends... TOOOOOOooooo many bdays going on in SEPT! 20th, 21st, 24th etc... omg... i very luan liao... and very broke liao=p diezzz...

other den tt, god-sis is getting married! damn! so sudden... hanpin oso finally proposed! after 11 freaking years of courtship... i wait till neck oso long liao=p hahahha... damn happy=) another 2 friends kicking off to the red carpet... btu shit! im still damn broke wif lots of debts... =( will wrk my ass off to clear the $4k debts by end of this year... man! it;s sure damn lots of money...=(

...it's autumn time, 4:12 AM

Finally... days has been cooler for me now...

Ive been quite slacking this week... but if i were to say... i rather not...

Ive finally handed in my 1st Graphic Design assignment, with 4 weeks passed, more den 4 assignments... i only handed up 1=p felt satisfied though... coz at least... i finally meet up with the dateline and got something done...

So ive slacked quite alot... slpt in school to get my other works done... slowly. but not cool...

Im quite disappointed with myself now... ive lost my passion i think... my film was made in a way that it consist of nthing. nthing as in no story, no climax, no meaning, no nthing. You wouldnt give a damn abot the clips i make now... coz it simply have nthing gd to comment abot. Worst, there's nthing bad either... simply... no comments...

Now quite a headache... the final film pitching is really jialat... i dun have a story. My story was crap, there's no conflict, no nthing as well. Jaymz (prof) says tt i have a serious prob in my story that dun wrk at all in any sense... *im the only one wif a straight-in-face-no! kind of remark...

Once again... im lost... that my passion in film came to drop and end so suddenly... i noe i wana make some film that is gd... that touches ppl, that invokes feelings... but now, i cant even convince myself to buy my own story=( really... this is bad... it might even result in those ppl w/o story wun get to shoot and juz help out wif other ppl's work! tt sux!

It used to be someone who'll support and interested in what ive made... but tt support is gone... i duno... how to make sense out of this... juz like my pitch... it's no-sense...

i wonder could i start talking to her again... den, getting some colours back into my work... coz afterall... the next show i really wana make... is to show this particular colour that lit my life...

~im inspired... but not enough without support...

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...it's autumn time, 4:18 PM

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